Why Counseling Works... A Lay Person's Perspective

- By Kelly Ann Alvares | February 10, 2009

I come from a culture where "therapy" is frowned upon. It is mental health after all, so if you're not ill - physically or mentally, you don't need a doctor or therapist. Emotional well-being on the other hand is considered to be in a different category, and there are various options to deal with issues that fall in that realm. Anyone who can spare the time to lend a listening ear, or just be a sounding board for your thoughts, has been known to accomplish something close (but not quite) to what you'd expect to get by seeing a therapist or a trained counselor. There are some important benefits to speaking with a trained counselor, that you won't get when you're talking to a friend or someone in the family.
Consistency - When you are in emotional distress, you could benefit a great deal from some consistency. When you're talking to a friend, they may or may not be there for you on a regular consistent basis.
Discipline - At the other extreme, your friends and family may be available "whenever" you need to talk. This may only serve as a "feel good" pill and may not encourage the discipline you need that goes along with the consistency that helps you achieve a longer term resolution.
Perspective - Counseling makes a big difference, when your counselor can listen to you and be your sounding board when what you really need, is to find the answers that lie within you, and offer some perspective when you need more than just a listening ear. A different perspective can shed light on what can seem like a very dark problem. A counselor who is trained and experienced, can offer you perspective based on various different angles - but what is most important is that a counselor be able to offer you the right perspective based on where you are coming from and where you are currently at.
Solutions - A counselor will help you find solutions - whereas someone who is not trained, and who may be emotionally vested in you may be in a hurry to give you solutions to your problem. While this provides temporary relief, it doesn't make you any stronger. A counselor will know when to work with an immediate need and maybe provide a temporary solution, but will follow it up with a longer term strategy to equip you with the tools to find solutions yourself.